Monday, April 11, 2011

DEAR UNCLE WILLIAM 3

Here's your third weekly Tuesday dollop of DEAR UNCLE WILLIAM!

HOT BABE'S NOW A FRUMPY FATTIE
(Daily Star, 10/4/11)
When I first started going out with my girlfriend three years ago she was gorgeous. All my mates were jealous and I was made up. She was slim and had lovely long blonde hair. She always dressed provocatively and our sex life was sizzling. We’d have sex all over the house and, frankly, anywhere else. 
But gradually she’s really changed. She’s let her hair grow out. It is now brown and cut short. She’s ditched her contact lenses and wears glasses, and she’s put on about three stone. I look at her and wonder where the girl I loved has gone. She’s like a totally different person. 
I’m not shallow and know it’s not all about looks, but her personality has changed too. Instead of the bubbly girl who was always laughing, she now criticises me for everything. She moans all the time, compares me unfavourably to her previous boyfriends and if we have sex once a week I’m lucky. 
She isn’t the girl I fell in love with any more. I’ve been trying to end our relationship but she won’t listen.

Uncle William says:
She won't listen? Or you won't tell her in so many words?
If men have one primal fear with women, it's that of doing things that will disappoint.
In fact, to such an extent, and luckily only few women exploit this, that her referring to a guy's actions with words to the effect of 'I'm disappointed in you' or 'you disappoint me' contains extremely powerful behaviourally manipulative potential. It will, as if by magic, turn a dangerous snarling animal into a subservient puppy dog.
Cut out the murky nice-guy bullshit, man up, tell her it's over. It's too late. She's been testing you all this time, and the horrible cuntish way she looks and acts now is because you've been consistently failing. 

DEAR UNCLE WILLIAM 2
DEAR UNCLE WILLIAM

3 comments:

morelikespace said...

Well said. Ordering you around is a woman's way of telling you that she's disappointed at the fact that you're too weak to maintain her respect.

Luke P. McElroy said...

I've noticed this in more than just personal relationships - at work I've been told by colleagues they were "disappointed" in my actions, a word they seem to consciously select as the best to make me feel guilty. Whenever I hear it now I have a bit of a laugh to myself and treat the rest of what they say as a puerile whinge (which most of the time it is).

Odile Lee said...

your girlfriend is a changling.
obviously, evil faery's have stolen the 'good' one and left you with some troll.
you have no choice but to kill her in her sleep with a bread knife, and hope that magically, her body is returned.
p.s. if it didnt work, and the cops put you in prison, then she wasn't a changling, she was just a pain in the ass bitch. your well rid her anyway, and may I say perhaps the rest of us as well. sorry!