LA REGLA

OK, you can call me a bit old-fashioned, but in relationships I have 2 or 3 rules before I'll go out with someone, and one of them is to always call a person's bullshit. Like lateness. I try to always show respect and turn up on time and expect the same in return. So if a woman's wilfully late, I'll say so and give her a nice smack on the ass, and then demand she kiss me hard to make it up to me. It really works wonders.